It’s safe to say that the majority of my readers here are women in their 30s, 40s or 50s, so this topic will be relatable in some way! If you do not fall into this category, please don’t leave! I still think you might benefit from reading this, especially if you have a partner or sister or friend (etc) who falls into this age bracket. I’ve been talking about perimenopause with a lot of friends and family over the last 18 months or so, and the more people I speak to, the more my story resonated, and the more I realised this is something we need to be talking about!

So let’s do it. Let’s talk about peri-menopause. In my own personal experience, and talking to the women around me, and listening to podcasts, here’s some of what we are dealing with:

Some women have rage attacks so fierce that they scream at their kids for minor infringements, and an hour later they are being silly and playful with their kids, and then that night they might have a cry at a tissue commercial*; some women develop crippling anxiety for the first time in their lives and can’t leave the house; some women suffer for years before peri-menopause is picked up; some women have a great GP who can spot it early on and suggest interventions*8; some women are mis-diagnosed with depression (very common) and put on anti-depressants that don’t make a difference; some women do sink into a deep depression and think there is something wrong with them; some women’s stress goes through the roof for the first time in their lives and their cortisol goes way out of balance and they start putting on weight around their middle as a result which adds to the despair of it all*; some women start waking up with aching joints that weren’t aching before*; some women feel lost and hopeless and sad and alone and have no idea what on earth is going on with their minds and bodies*; some women start crying at the start of their tuckshop shift when someone asks her “how are you going?”*

*things I have had personal experience with…

It can be so upsetting and confronting when one or more of these things happen within a short period of time. This was me last year. I thought I was getting depressed again, so I took myself off to my GP for an assessment and a chat. I had started putting on weight around my belly for no good reason and my brain fog was worse than when I was pregnant. I felt so low for long periods of time, and found myself feeling rage like never before, generally towards my children.

Once my GP and I figured out what the heck was going on, I started on Oestrogen gel, and decided to have a chat to the kids about it. I told the kids a bit about menopause and how that I was going through hormonal changes, a bit like what Chance and Quinn were going through. I told them I feel as though I’ve been more cranky lately, and nodding from the older two confirmed this. I asked, with some trepidation if they had noticed. Chance’s answer was quite lovely – he said he had noticed that I seem to be getting cranky quicker, but that I’ve also been more fun with them. I explained that’s exactly what happens when hormones go up and down. I apologised to them, and asked them to try and be helpful and understanding when they can tell I’m getting a bit overwhelmed with things.

And I have to say, Chance checks in on me quite a bit when he notices I’m acting cranky and stressed. He gently pulls me aside and asks “are you feeling a bit stressed at the moment Mama?” Then asks if I want a hug. I love that he is looking out for me. I’m also very grateful to have Marty and my parents supporting me at this time. I really didn’t feel like myself for many months last year, and am still adjusting to what this transition looks like for my body and mind, and without their support it would be so much harder.

For anyone who is interested, I’m on estradiol which is a natural oestrogen gel, as well as progesterone tablets. The estradiol calmed the rage that was often simmering below the surface and helped with my mood as well. I have been doing a lot of research via podcasts and articles on The Menopause and peri-menopause and my goodness I have learnt so much! I’m planning to do a few blog posts on this over the coming months and maybe even years, as I go through peri-menopause (now) and menopause at some stage in the next 5-10 years. But I just wanted to start by sharing my story and I hope that it helps to know that if you are on this rollercoaster, you are not alone xx